Yesterday my husband and I got into a bit of a argument. I in a mess of tears find myself feeling a little selfish. Here I sit crying over a grill ( long story ) and I think of all the greater problems then my own.
In an argument I think each person is looking to be the "right" one. I think to myself do I really need to be "right"? Is being the "right" one worth this fight? Is this fight worth anything? How can I stop this fight when I think that I am the "right" one without making my husband say that I am the "right" one? Do I need him to tell me that, or do I just want to win? How can I control this behavior when I don't even realize it until there is already a fight?
I wish I had the answers to these questions that ramble in my mind, but I do not. I think that no matter what book I read, what friend I go to for advise, or what journal entry I make I will not find the answers. What I can do is pray to God for peace of mind and know in my heart that God loves me and that one day the troubles of this world big or small, selfish or not will be taken away from me if I follow him.
This world, better my life is a struggle for control. I know that when I say God I cannot handle this, he will handle it. It's a matter of letting go and letting God take control, I pray right now that I can become better at letting God lead my life instead of myself. I pray that I will not be Luke warm for God. It is so much worse to know what is right and not do it than it is to do wrong and not know the difference. When you know what is right it takes strength and discipline. I am weak in these qualities but God is strong so I pray he will take over for me.
Now I feel it, peace of mind. Thank you God!
In an argument I think each person is looking to be the "right" one. I think to myself do I really need to be "right"? Is being the "right" one worth this fight? Is this fight worth anything? How can I stop this fight when I think that I am the "right" one without making my husband say that I am the "right" one? Do I need him to tell me that, or do I just want to win? How can I control this behavior when I don't even realize it until there is already a fight?
I wish I had the answers to these questions that ramble in my mind, but I do not. I think that no matter what book I read, what friend I go to for advise, or what journal entry I make I will not find the answers. What I can do is pray to God for peace of mind and know in my heart that God loves me and that one day the troubles of this world big or small, selfish or not will be taken away from me if I follow him.
This world, better my life is a struggle for control. I know that when I say God I cannot handle this, he will handle it. It's a matter of letting go and letting God take control, I pray right now that I can become better at letting God lead my life instead of myself. I pray that I will not be Luke warm for God. It is so much worse to know what is right and not do it than it is to do wrong and not know the difference. When you know what is right it takes strength and discipline. I am weak in these qualities but God is strong so I pray he will take over for me.
Now I feel it, peace of mind. Thank you God!
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